I kinda just went with what finally came to mind, knowing as I did that it would feel rushed. yeah, that's fast, but I could think of nothing more appropriate to force them to see eye to eye otherwise. It had nothing to do with "I must do this because it's in my job description and I'm the only one who can" and everything to do with "I don't know if I can do this and I need some encouragement."Īs to Octavia and Vinyl settling their differences. Lacking a particularly strong willpower, she simply needed to give herself a morale boost. The question, then, is of Fluttershy's mental position at that time. Bear in mind that this is the Fluttershy from early in the show, back when she was still a doormat and not very confident in herself. Let's get into the "Element Bearer" thing Fluttershy said, because you definitely read too much into what she was saying there. Perhaps I'll put it down in my Requests list. Makes me think I should do more than merely throwing your story in my RiL. Take care.Ħ215841 Well, this is much more than I anticipated. Thank you so much for letting me review it and I hope to hear more from you in the future. It was fun, it was well written for what we got, it had a fun little moral, a couple things I did harp on, but nothing that overall hurts the quality for me. I haven't read the other one so, maybe that will change, but even if it does, I liked this one. Overall, a fun experience and a great entry into the competition.
It totally works as it's own thing, even if you've never seen the episode. This could have been it's own fan fiction and is totally good with not being a copy of an episode. Upsetting Fluttershy, who had been so kind to them, would probably do it, but it didn't feel as urgent to me.Īnother thing I wanted to point out was, I liked how it wasn't the episode. That's not to say that I don't understand why they felt the need to try to get along. Again, I could be overanalyzing it, but it felt a bit rushed. But it's not a huge amount that it was really distracting. I'll admit the way Octavia and Vinyl kissed and made up. Maybe it's nothing and maybe I am reading way too much into that, but it bugged me. that just because she has that title, she's the only one who can do the right thing. And I get it, she is the element of kindness, that's who she is, but it just feels like. The biggest nitpick, and this is a nitpick which in no way hurts the story, why does she have to call herself an 'Element Bearer' or feels she has a responsibility because she is an 'Element Bearer'? She can't just feel responsible because that's who she is. Which is nice because it makes them both more relatable in situation where they are basically living with someone they can't stand. Instead, they both take turns being unreasonable. It was good to see that instead of making one or the other just completely unbelievable. I like how they constantly switch back and forth between one of them being uncivil to the other, keeping an nice balance. Seeing them clashing personality wise and styles was rather fun. The way the two musicians interacted was rather fun. Not bad, but it did take me out of the experience for a little bit. And maybe its a popular thing, I don't know.īut it was odd. It's just odd because I'd never heard of it. I think that the writing is strong enough that she doesn't really need to talk. I'm not saying it was a bad choice, I think in this situation, it works. I know about the Octavia/Vinyl thing, who hasn't, but. The choice to have Vinyl a mute? Is that a common thing in the brony community? Because I have never heard that before. I think that's mostly because I enjoyed what I got and wanted to enjoy more. But for what we got, I did feel like there was enough there that it didn't really ruin it for me. While I do see that, I frankly would have liked more. Reading the author's note, I can see where you were going for as far as mental thoughts and such. Okay, so this is the review of One Night at Fluttershy's.